Marriage is hard. Like hard. Life tries to get the best of you.
So here’s how the Warren’s keep sanity around this nut house:
First, fill up your cup with humor, peace, joy, and gratefulness. It’s ammunition for bad days. A warehouse, if you will, stocked with good vibes.
Second, use your supply intentionally.
Sometimes you have to “make light of the situation”.
So the good car broke down and you have to drive the old van with no air conditioning for a week- in August.
Robert and I have handled situations like this two ways:
1. We dread going to work and being sweaty when we get there. We worry about the unexpected expense we haven’t budgeted for. We complain to each other about said van. We are both in a crabby mood for at least a week (sometimes longer because it starts to become a habit- even after the situation is remedied).
2. We are grateful to have a second car to fall back on. We are aware that lots of couples don’t have even one reliable vehicle. We are thankful that we can afford to fix car A without any financial help from anyone. We roll down the windows, turn on Hotel California and sing. We call sweat a “summer glow”. And I embrace the natural texture of my hair.
Option #2 is so much easier on the human spirit. But you have to choose it.
Third, don’t be afraid to be silly. We both spent way too many years reserved, too embarrassed to let go and have FUN. Let me tell you, that was a colossal waste of time.
Were all the days in these photos fabulous days? Probably not. This is, after all, real life. There were most likely talks about car payments, or who’s taking the kid to Boy Scouts and who’s mowing the lawn today. But the feelings we had in these pics are the feelings I remember. And they are all good.
Make it a point to enjoy each other.
It is by no means easy to have fun all of the time. You have to make a conscious decision to enjoy everything you have. And you have to make a conscious decision to NOT focus on what you don’t have.
“He/she made me laugh” is almost always one of the reasons we fell in love with our mate. DON’T LOSE THAT.
Keep it light. Keep it fun. Don’t take yourself too seriously. Appreciate each other. Enjoy the little things. Be grateful for all the things. Laugh.